Photo Credit: Mart1n,

We’re all unique, just look at the faces of individuals you know and you’ll be in awe how a Designer can create countless flavors of faces. When someone looks at you, there are two precious eyes that one of a kind in the history of the world. When someone smiles at you, know that smile is one of the best gift you’ll ever receive, you’ll never receive it from somebody else.

Every features of our body is different from each other, so our strengths, flaws, and stories. We praise the pretty aspects of an individual, but it’s a sad fact that we also criticize the bad ones, sometimes without the intention of helping them.

I’ve judged many people and put negative labels on them while I’m still an unbeliever. Now as a Christian, I’m often amazed at myself at how can I easily judge others just because I know more proper conducts. It was so tempting to use my theological knowledge as a formidable judgment tool. But using Bible knowledge to be a better judge of others is not the way of life we’re called into. Without the intention to love, we have no right to judge.

The time came when I heard the other chapters of their life: his father who left and never return, the inattentive parents, the betrayal, the abuse, the days without food, the unexpected tragedy, the countless nights when their faces are marred with unending tears.

I became ashamed of what I’ve done. How can I be that insensitive? I’ve measured their worth with incomplete information and I’ve failed to love them as Jesus will do. Even they didn’t reply a word, I know that they are dying to say that, “It hurts more than you know.”

Imagine yourself going to an optometrist because your vision are little bit blurry. After some tests, the optometrist handed his own glasses to you and said, “Take this, it works for me for years, I’m confident that it will work for you too.” Would you come back to that insane optometrist? Maybe you’ll even recommend a psychiatrist to him.

It is so easy to assume that others have the same autobiography as ourselves. We think that we’ve encountered same struggles and learned identical lessons, but God didn’t send us to the same ‘school’, our lives are written individually, so a one-size-fits-all prescription will not work.

We judged them in our own lenses. Our heads are appalled by their behaviors that needs changing. We asked them why they are acting in the ways we will never do. We don’t understand them and we’re insisting that they must understand us.

On his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey explained the importance of understanding others first as an individual worthy of love before assuming that they will understand us. I hope I know and do something about this in the past. I thank God for the forgiveness and the chance do it right from now on.

Some people are just plain difficult to live with (I know, I’ve been this kind of people to others). But before harassing them with criticism, let’s remember that maybe we don’t really understand them. Maybe, they have hurts that we know nothing about.

His heart was broken for years, let us not break it even more, let’s come to him and be the heaven-sent healing that he desperately crave for.

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